I am astounded, even as I write, that my relationship with this male cardinal grew relatively quickly from just friends to Best Friend Forever (BFF) status.
Here's how it started, innocently enough, you'll have to agree. I had a week off work for a vacation and my plans changed from visiting my Southern grandchildren, to sitting often on my back porch. I was alone, I was broke, and so the best way to conserve money and energy was to sit and sip. Some would sip wine, I sip coffee.
Get out of bed, grab a cup of coffee, feed the cat, water the plants, growl at the goldfish and maybe throw a token crumb or two his way, go to the back porch and sit awhile. Sit awhile are words you don't hear that often anymore, but were used alot in the day of my grandma. Sit awhile indicated your presence was desired, your company sought and your time valuable. I love nothing better than to say "Come in and sit awhile" to a friend, but thus far in my Post David Living Experience (PDLE), I have maybe just a couple of friends who have sat awhile. Cheryl comes to mind immediately, since just today she left me a note on my front door, behind my dishtowel that keeps the screen door closed. It was her just stopping by on the chance I would be here. I love Cheryl. I sometimes say "Come in and sit awhile" and she does. We talk, we fuss, we complain, we praise God together, we cry, we laugh, we sip tea. Cheryl likes tea better than coffee, but I don't hold that against her, I give in on that point for friendship's sake :-) .
Where was I? Oh, My new BFF and I building our relationship. So I am on the back porch, sipping my early morning coffee and over flies this bright red, noisy cardinal. He apparently is chirping at me because I am too close to something. He would sit, sing, chirp madly and leave. As the week went by, I held my ground and returned to the porch, and he changed his view of me and slowly included me in his circle of safe things to sing around. Sing he did! ♪☺ I tried videotaping it(OK, of course I did ) and somewhere between me and my camera was a disastrous result~ wobbly , wavy and no sound! Hahahaha! Some things just have to be enjoyed without sharing.
Every day Mr C went from one particular sassafras tree branch to another, singing a call that was either praising the Creator or calling his future mate. Clearly a happy call. Chirp, chirp, chirp sort of thing. But then as I watched and sipped my coffee, he would get really agitated and start another raucous call, more like an attacking cry that was not at all pleasant. I learned , through daily observation, that this meant get out of here Ms. Cat or you will be dive bombed.
Would you trust this face around your nest? Smart BFF.
My daily morning visits found the cardinal getting closer and braver as he became used to my quiet, listening self. I perceived that when I talked, he was not happy. Yes, before you can ask, I did try to talk to this new friend. The results were a sudden flutter of wings and a solid hour of waiting for him to reappear and begin again. I learned quickly that he liked listeners way better than talkers.
One day he invited his wife to visit us, and she timidly approached the porch area, taking her sweet time and keeping her sounds to herself. He was definitely the louder and more bold of the two. I think he was protecting her too, because she was always in the distance watching and only arrived after a slight change in the chirp sounds.
I'd like to tell you here that I now speak Cardinalese, but seriously, these birds have at least 4 different sounds and I have yet to figure out what sets each one off. I am just more appreciative of them and am definitely loving the male of the species much better than the female. Well, let me show you :
She is rather attractive, I suppose, but not nearly as flashy or friendly as her bird counterpart. I had almost given up on the male species, what with PDLE and all, but it seems the case was specific to one human male rather than the male gender in general. [just kidding.]
Come out and sit awhile was no longer a passing thought, but my mission each morning. I had to go look and listen for my BFF! He might miss me! He might do something really awesome! He might show me , finally, where that elusive nest was hiding so I could watch baby BFF's being made.
Oh, you who know me, must know that this Blog is not going to be just about Birds! Indeed, there is another parallel I am drawing mentally here. It took the entire week of observation, pondering and sipping to figure out where my own mind was traveling. Like the Mr. C who hops around on the ground before he sings from the treetops, it took me all week.
Relationships worth having take time, and intentionality. They come from sitting awhile and from listening and caring. These potentially BFF relationships can appear ill suited at first. There may be preconceived notions present , like...he is too flashy, or, he is too beautiful for me, or...we have nothing in common.
Time well spent this week, not talking on the phone, texting or computering, was the hours(yes, hours) I took to learn about Mr. Cardinal. I regret not a minute of it, and believe me when I say it was chilly some mornings!
It was not just sipping coffee on my back porch and listening to Birds that occupied my mornings. I also sat with the Creator of my BFF. I listened to what God said about Himself, sitting quietly so as to learn what I could of Him by NOT talking and NOT making noises. He told us all about Himself in the Bible, His Holy Word, set apart for those who desire to know Him better. Time well spent and I am so happy that I Sat Awhile .