Simply Thank You GOD.

One of the things I like to do is reflect on life within and around me, as anyone who has read my blogs knows. Hey, that's why I write a blog!

The last blog I wrote completely in my head (an unusual thing for me , I prefer writing as I think ) and it never ended up as a blog posting. It was good too, believe me :-) !It had been about Thanksgiving and there was a list and it was boring and blah, blah, blah. I wondered to myself if our thankful hearts become just a list, how thankful are we -really? Just people of God making up the random, immediate, usual stuff kind of Thanks God! obligatory task. Reminded me of cheer-leading and superficiality and I felt ungrateful.

The week since Thanksgiving has been one, however, in which my senses have been on high alert. When I wrote senses , I meant senses in a different way than hearing, seeing, smelling, touching, and tasting
sense.  I am speaking of my gratitude attitude sense. The sense of truly understanding how many good and perfect gifts are mine, just by seeing and acknowledging their existence.

Here's how the week went for me , and I am going to stream line it into the things that just jumped out at me when I was on high alert, needing to thank God in the midst of the mundane.

First of all, a young woman friend , who is almost more of a Facebook friend than a real time life friend, offered to take my Blog and practice her skills at Web something or other. I am not an internet expert, so have even forgot what it is called! I hesitated, thinking that I was fond of my own page and did this mean my creativity was ugly and unnecessary? See the struggle playing out? She offered again, and so I decided to take the plunge, let go of the reins of rights to a web designing talent I did not own, and told her my password. Less than an hour later and with no drama or flare, I was informed it was ready. Here's the thing : she made it perfectly ME, and she knows me barely at all!!!! She had my favorite dogwood tree picture(I took it ! ) and she had the Psalms and she had the scribbling illustration....and as soon as I told her how much I loved birds...there one was!

Second experience following closely behind the first was a trip to the  Conowingo Dam with my friend Jean. 'Randomly' reading about a place to observe Bald Eagles in large numbers in a newspaper article, I was determined to go see it. I even gave up meeting BFF Judy for a lunch and shopping spree, because seeing these eagles was way higher on my list ( hahahaha! get it? ). I enlisted Jean's supportive presence right after church and off we drove! I was stoked, ready for an Eagle and a burger. Well, about that cheeseburger sub, can I say that not all burgers are created equal? Enough said on that subject because the Eagle observation ahead was worth that blasted burger!

I am not kidding when I say that I could easily have stayed at this Dam sanctuary for hours! Even the Dam was beautiful and God even threw in several other birds for us to see!

My hands were numb, my heart was racing, and I was awed by these magnificent birds -my eagles. One of my favorite passages in the Bible has always been in Isaiah 40:28-31 and then verse 31 was screaming in my head- But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like Eagles...!!!! It was as if God was whispering in my ear that I too, after years of utter and complete exhaustion and discouragement, would be renewed and soar again! Oh my, a wonderfully freeing, anticipatory thought to be thankful for.

Thirdly, since I am making my own list, my daughter Julie Grace called me. Julie is my baby and she is 26 years old and the mother of Ethan, one of my 11 blessings called grandchildren. I love Julie but she is not a warm and fuzzy kind of daughter, which is also part of what makes me love her more.She needed my assistance in getting their Christmas Tree! and could she use my car and also did I want to go too??!? Words to make a lonely mother's hear warm and melt !

When I thought this week could not contain anything new, I came home to find a Lands End box on my doorstep. Now I am forgetful, I'll give you that much, but I am pretty certain I did not order anything this week from Lands End! Amazon- yes, Pottery Barn-yes, but Lands End? just to be sure I waited to open it until this morning in case one of the kids used my address as a Santa's Workshop kind of place. There inside was a package with a bow and a note for me... love from Becky! Oh my, a surprise package from Becky, my long- distance, beautiful young friend who always chooses the most perfect gifts for me! I could not wait and sneaked a look -do not tell this to my children because I am a die-hard never open anything until the exact day  kind of girl!!! It is a BAG with my initials and it is orange. SIGH. I love that she got me something that felt like nobody even could know I wanted and there it was. How is this possible, God of the hearts? I then re-wrapped it. :-)

Last night our church had a WIC (Women in the Church) Christmas Tea that I almost missed because I was so tired. Well, blast it, I am too young for missing everything because of work exhaustion! so I went. Beautiful Gift. Not just the decorations and the foods and the reminders from friend Darlinda of God's Faithfulness, but the parting warm hug from my friend Myrtle. I was out by my car, leaving and feeling like I wished I had dressed up, I wished I had done something significant, I wished I was more this and less that.....Myrtle just gave me a HUG and said " You are so beautiful and have such a smiling warm face, thank you for coming ". That was God, reminding me that my list is never ending, His love for me is undeserving , and I need to keep being on high alert because Thanksgiving is followed by Christmas - and He doesn't stop giving.

Thanksgiving Thoughts before I go shopping

Last night I considered shopping after work, since there are starting to be so many people in stores that I get in a panic when they seem to all want to shop whichever store I am in , at the same time. Used to be , says the old gal, that I loved the crowds and the confusion of Christmas shopping. Not so much anymore.

I could get off topic and start another thought here, but will stay focused and write about this morning and watching Mr. Blue Jay. It is a crisp, cool, perfectly sun filled Autumn day and I am wild about the possibilities! NO WORK for 5 days fills me with such delight I want to savor every single second, so I even got up early to have more savoring time!

Last year I didn't feed my birds, between the budget and my prioritizing , the birds made it on  number 11 of a 5 point list. This year I went and searched for a cheaper way to feed them and found some  bag of inexpensive seeds that looks like something no bird would be excited about. But hey, I am feeding them~ peck away friends!

So, as the story goes, [really love that it sounds like something exciting is being talked about with that one little clause :-) ] I made my delicious morning coffee, and decided to take a picture of a bird feeding.

 

The air was chilly, but I was determined to capture a photographic moment by being patient. As minutes rolled into almost an hour, my heart was full of gratitude to God for this chance to sit on my own back porch and just BE.  

I spied a Blue Jay! There he was just calmly sitting in the very top of the neighbor's tree!

This guy was far away, but I have a good zoom :-). As he waited, I talked to my best friend, who also happens to be God. Thanksgiving was the reason I was luxuriating in the nippy air on my back porch. How is it that I could possibly thank Him for so many things when the list is so long? Do I begin with breath and end with health? How about the job, the friends, the children and grands? Do I mention people by name? The bird would be here and gone by the time I recall everyone I love. (I am kind of a friend collector, btw)

Excuse me from my thoughts for a moment , the Blue Jay is coming closer....

 I know, he sat behind the pole on purpose, don't try to convince me he didn't.

Well, being a grateful person doesn't seem so unique, nor sufficient for Thanksgiving 2010, unless I could specify to God how much I truly thanked Him for my life, as bungled up and messy as it may be.  

Then there was the Blue Jay.

 

The Blue Jay was today's lesson on a chilled fall day. He began so far away I could barely see him. I knew by his shape and call that he was indeed a Blue jay, but until he got close enough to see better, I doubted myself and my ability to name him. 

Then I waited and he hopped down closer. As I patiently pondered his strategy, I noted he was watching me long before I was watching him! Amazing-he saw me on the porch!! Closer and closer he came to his seeds scattered around~ without apologies I scatter them on the railing so I can see the birds more easily!

Finally, he landed and I clicked, and then I couldn't stop taking pictures-he was magnificent and delightful and beautiful.

 

The more closely I saw him, the more I loved him!

Ok ....who was that my camera caught?

About that sparrow.....

Anyone who knows me and reads my rantings, knows there is a moral to my story, so here it comes!

My walk with God has been very much like my watching the Blue jay approaching. The similarities almost overwhelm me, filling me with humility and thanks.

On God's terms He drew me to Himself. As He waited and watched from His lofty, protective place, I impatiently continued to think I knew Him and His ways. I did not, I do not. By studying Him through reading what He has said about Himself and His ways, (The Bible), I am knowing Him more intimately as well as seeing His true Person more clearly. By waiting patiently, not jumping to conclusions, I know Him and His ways and can tell the differences between the true God and the one I have created in my mind or from facts gained by casual observers.

He is Beautiful! He is worth knowing better! He is Who I need to think about on Thanksgiving and every other day He allows me to know Him.

Unlike Mr. Blue Jay, God is not frightened by my presence. Unlike Mr. Blue Jay, God knows me, knows when I need Him , and thankfully, He gently, kindly helps me, even when I am at work. :-)

But for today, I want to tell people how beautiful He truly is. That is my Thanksgiving thought for 2010.

Different families, Same God

Sometimes I just feel like writing. Maybe it comes when I have nobody to talk to, or when the cat annoys me, or when the sun is streaming onto the fallen leaves and the air is chilly when I go get my newspaper from the end of the driveway. [BTW, was that a run on sentence?]

Today is busy and yesterday was busy and last week was busy and I need a break. The reason I need a break isn't because I am too tired , but rather because my head is full. On Facebook this week I alluded to it when status updating that my head was like a closet, full of stuff that needed sorting, rather than waiting for a seasonal overhaul.

The problem being, I am introspective, I suspect, and the issues of life, if properly processed, need to be thought slowly through. Most people live the life of a microwave, and I want to live life as a crockpot. When the kids were younger it was definitely a pressure cooker life style, but aren't things after age 60(did I mention I am that old?!?) supposed to be easier?

I know, a random picture, but it made me feel happy, so I inserted it :-) When you write a random blog, you can do anything you want to.

Today is a young friend's birthday. Not unusual, of course, but the fact is I miss this young person's happy smile and warm personality.

 That is exhibit B, on the far right, February 2008, Andy's birthday)

I wrote a greeting on her Facebook Wall under her assumed name, but have no idea if she will ever get it. I also have no idea how her life is , because 2 years ago she disappeared off the planet with her girlfriend. She was my son Andrew's best friend since childhood, and her MIA hit many of us hard. What would make a young , enthusiastic, vital young well loved person just leave? This question has plagued me often and today it just makes me more crazy trying to think it through. I am terrified of one of my children doing the same thing, Perhaps I am more sensitive to this than most people since in January 2002 my husband David did the same thing. Just disappeared.

Coincidentally, a new baby girl is being baptized this afternoon , her great grandfather performing the ceremony, her parents proudly participating, along with other loving family members and friends. They will be trusting God, the True, Faithful, Father of all our special babies,to be covenanting with them to bring Baby N into His Kingdom, in His time.  Does this mean she will be guaranteed entrance into the Kingdom of God? Absolutely not, and they are well aware of it. As they publicly join with their Covenant Family to ask for prayer and commitment to this task of teaching her about Jesus Christ, their young hearts will be filled with Hope and Joy and Love beyond measure. Hope that in Jesus Christ , when  Baby N is able to understand and grasp how deep the Father's love is for her, she will accept Him as her personal Savior. Joy, that He has invited them into His Kingdom and as part of His loving blessings, He has included this little girl into their tasks of jobs to do for Him- raise her in the Love of the Lord.

So, back to my Covenant Friend, Exhibit B. This girl was raised in the church, by loving parents and surrounded by youth pastors and friends and neighbors who cared. There were prayers for her throughout her entire life. I know this because I personally and fervently have prayed for her, for her salvation and safety and understanding of the Gospel .
I love her deeply, cannot imagine the pain of her parents and siblings as she stays gone. And yet.....

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever. God is still in control of His Kingdom, His people, His Church and His children.

There are 3 sets of parents in my blog. The new Baby N mom and dad, waiting for the Baptism and Blessings this afternoon, trusting the past faithful covenant keeping God; my older, seasoned, hurting parents of Miss B friends , having entrusted their daughter's birthday and life to God, living now, experiencing God's grace day by day; and me, the single mom who is unpacking her closet of issues involving her children, wondering if the future will be rocky or smooth. I am also trusting God the Father of the future for His grace, His love, and His mercy to my children.

Jesus Christ, the same Yesterday, mom and dad, Today, mom and dad, and Forever, mom and dad.
amen
Now it is time to go Worship my King.